Study for Psychology or write a blog....

16 things you may or may not know about me

1. I am left handed.  Also right brained.  All the left-y stereo types, yeah I fit them

2. I like to be the best at everything.  This is a terrible personality flaw i feel, mostly because if I don't think I can be the best, then I won't even try.  Its not so much that I get really competitive and mean when I'm not good, its more that i give up...yeah

3. I don't like little kids...ok not to the point where I don't want any, but seriously I don't understand how people could want to teach them for the rest of their lives...it impresses me...a lot.

4. There is a very special place in my heart for people with special needs.  I love to work with them, and talk to them, and hang out with them.  If I could do something else with my life and teach theatre, I would teach special ed. 

5.  I am ridiculously afraid of spiders.  Not just the "O no, a spider," no. like freak out afriad of them, and not just real ones...fake ones scare me ALOT too...want to be mean, thats the way to go

6.  I am terrible at drawing....its really sad...

7. I am the oldest of 4...also the smallest of them...irony? I think so

8. I have wrecked my car twice, and the second time she was about 100 dollars off from being totaled...both were my fault, and the second involved three cars....awesome

9. Until my senior year in high school, since about the 5th grade, I wanted to go into medicine, cardiology to be exact...God works in some pretty cool ways

10. I am at a point in my life, where if I single for the rest of my life, I am 100% ok with that...I don't know that it will happen, but if thats the case, then cool

11. I want to do the peace corps when i graduate college.  

12. I want to open my own youth theatre company after I teach for a few years.  I feel like theatre is something that is really really important, and something that is really great for kids, especially those from low income families.  I want to do free after school programs, and show kids, families, and the community what a little acting can do for the world

13.  I also want to work with inner city communities for the rest of my life.  Kids in these areas deserve just as much of a good education as kids from places with insane amounts of money, and it isn't fair that they don't get it...this would also be known as my soap box...

14.  I love to ski.  I love it I love it I love it....

15. I love to clean.  I am an emotional cleaner, which is convenient sometimes.  I also love to clean for people.  I love to help people out that way.  Not because i want them to like me, or because I think it will make me look better, just because I like to do it :-) (this is an open invitation fyi)

16.  I love Jesus.

Rose Colored Glasses

Then the King will say, 'I'm telling the solemn truth: Whenever you did one of these things to someone overlooked or ignored, that was me—you did it to me.'

Mattew 25:40

So, as a Christian, I talk a lot about living for and like Christ...cause its kinda that point I guess?? I mean even the word Christian mean little Christ.  So thats what we try to do.  The goal would be that every action, every thought, every moment of our lives is aimed at  Christ, and for his purpose....so heres what I've been learning about that :-)

Relationships define our lives it seems.  So how do we reflect and reach for Christ in our relationships.  We all know we are called to love people, and to put others above ourselves.  Ok, but really though what does look like??

heres some stuff from my journal a few days ago

"...its like I work so hard to love people, and they won't return it...I guess thats not really why I should love people, though, is it?  I should love them because that is how Christ loves me-even when I don't love Him back, and even when I am a total idiot, selfish and mean, he loves me back.  I should love his people, simply because he loves me.  Even Satan can love his friends, the people who love him back.  I am called to love all his people, no matter how they feel about me, or are rue to me or use me, or have too high expectations of me.  I have to love them back.  We are called to live in love"

Love for people isn't about how they feel about us, and as much as I try to say, "O I'm not doing to get them to love me back," it hurts when they don't because I feel like I have put a lot into the relationship, but that isn't what love is about.  Loving people is about Christ, and His love for us.  That change in perspective makes all the difference in the way we treat people, and how we react to the way they treat us.  We are called to love, simply and ONLY because He first loved us.  His love is all we need in return.

The Church, not a church

If you been to church for any period of time, you've probably heard the passage in 1 Corinthians about one body, and many parts(1 Corinthians 12:12-).  In this passage from his letter to the Corinthians, in its context I think paul is referring to personal gifts we all have, and how they all have to work together, and how each one is as important as the other.  

However, I also see a strong message to churches across the world, especially the western world.  I think that having a place to worship is an AWESOME thing, and I for one LOVE my church home.  I just fear that us Christians have become too obsessed with OUR church, when in reality, we are all THE Church.  In verse 13, Paul rights 

"for we were all baptized by one Spirit into ONE body-whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free-and we were all given the one Spirit to drink"(i added the big letters)

Why does it matter that one Church sings hymns, while another plays hardcore? Why does it matter if my pastor has tattoos and wears sandals and a tee shirt to preach, while yours wears a suit and bow-tie.  We make a choice as to what worship we attended, and what part of the community of Christ we are involved in.  I just pray that we, in loving our church home, have not lost sight of what we really are, and that is ONE body.  We should love our neighbor churches, even when they are different.  When we believe and are redeemed by the same Jesus, He has called us to be ONE body.  I pray that we remember that.

Honestly

So I'm thinking this might be kinda lame, but whatever.  The goal of this is to share what God is doing in my life.  I figured that I should start a new one because my summer one...well it isn't summer anymore.  Thats about it.  

So I am reading Irresistible Revolution.  Its pretty incredible.  God is really using it to kinda point me in some direction.  Maybe not direction.  Maybe more just push some of my passions into light.  I don't know, but I am discovering my passion for the poor, like inter-city kids.  I have always been drawn to them, but I never really like actually wanted to do it.  Like I never thought it was really possible, with funding, and there's not really anywhere to live in those areas, especially for a teacher, and well I don't know, it just never really seemed possible.  It always looked cool, but never really possible.  God will provide though, and I can just feel my heart being pulled there.  

So this whole little unexpected change in my life called ending-the-relationship-I-thought-was for-good has really opened my eyes.  I hate to admit it, but I think that it being over was good.  It opened my ears to what God had to say, and where he was pointing my life, and just broke me I guess.  Ok heres where I am/was/am moving from...(thanks Carl Cartee)

"Honestly" 

Could I let go of all that you've given If it meant that it all would be yours

Could I sit at your feet, and forget about me, and remember what I'm here for

Honestly I need to be broken

Honestly I need to fall down

Go ahead and shake my foundation  

Cause Honestly I'm figuring out 

that of all that I have, all that I need is you

honestly

If I leave behind all thats familiar Could I do what has never been done

If I believed in you like you believe in me, would you finish the work you've begun

So this is what I have been learning I guess.  But I just really want to be where God wants me.  I just want to do something for...well not "for", but I can't think of a different way to put it...with i guess... Him, and something big.  I just feel like there is something that God has in store for me, and I want to get there.  I just want to run as fast as I can after him, and I think God is just pulling me back to Him.  

As I head back to school, just pray that I am a light as I head back to school.  yeah